Helping a loved one with Anxiety, Depression or PTSD?
Take self-care first. I can remember when I saw a doctor for my son who was 8 at the time and using the word suicide. I was in the office with the doctor alone, and he told me I needed to get my anxiety under control, that I needed to check myself. Well, I lost it, something I had to forgive myself for later, but he was right. I also learned in the program here with Deborah, that self-care is primary, like putting the oxygen mask on yourself first before your child. It is not about being selfish, it is about surviving.
Studying the Chakra’s taught me about our personal energy field, the layers of it and ways to balance, clear and cleanse our system. It not only healed me physically but also mentally. One of the most important things I learned was that our field, our personal space, can affect those around us, just as another person’s field, energy or personal space can affect our own in a negative way.
There are a number of ways to protect your personal energy field, your personal space. The first thing I recommend is to keep a clear distance, respect your space and the space of others.
I can remember when my son was locked in his room. I kept wanting to go in and check on him, give him a hug. But I realized these were all the things I needed, not necessarily what he wanted. He needed his space, from me and I did not know it at the time, but I needed my space from him. It was a necessary protection. The more we were around each other during his bouts with anxiety and depression, the more the anxiety and depression circled between us. I unknowingly triggered him, and he the same with me. Remember to keep a loving, necessary space when needed.
I have found that some people tend to go off to their own room or space when they are not feeling well. I can remember being a mess, thinking what could be happening in there! Some good advice I received was to periodically say from outside the door, “I know you need your space, so I want you to have it. I will be downstairs if you need me”. When he/she comes down, acknowledge how impressed you are with them getting out of their own way, on their own. Let them pick themselves up off the floor. People are powerful, even if they suffer from anxiety and depression or PTSD. The key is finding it, even if for a split second, let them use their own power and pick themselves up.
People with ADP need help, but they also need to help themselves and then realize they were powerful enough to get out of those moments. Doing so will create more power and knowledge. If they get themselves up once, they can get themselves up a second time.
Energy, and feelings are contagious. People often ask how they can get their loved one get over whatever it is that is holding them back or to be a certain way and my answer is for them to be, just what they want from the other person. Be present, be joyful, be powerful, be loving, be truthful, be open, be connected.